To Army Commissioner Tian田軍容
1Asking his help in declining a rank
某慙無術略。久竊榮寵。提漢法之重權。陟秦官之極品。莫申展効。何贖貪叨。況自寇盜奔侵。京都陷覆。久守咽喉之寄。不成毫髮之功。雖兵柄旣多。固難措手。而君恩未報。實切靦顔。況乃室怒潛興。隣讎競起。陸遜徒稱其佳吏。崔暹終憾於癡人。顯奏相誣。多言可畏。幸蒙軍容推心庇護。極力保持。雖遭貝錦之詞。免陷織羅之罪。祗合以戀軒思幄。策蹇磨鉛。畢命爲期。在公無倦。但緣攝生罕妙。從役久勤。齒髮旣衰。精神亦耗。少私寡欲。敢言君子者乎。多病愛閑。方謂古人是也。智力不可強進。寵章不可濫行。實覺妨賢。只宜求退。今者肅淸鳳闕。撲滅梟巢。櫜弓矢以銷兵。永除戎備。垂衣裳而致理。廣任賢才。如某者。寒灰罷燃。眢井誰顧。往歲之南征北伐。雖忝當仁。此時之尸祿素餐。逾慙非據。旣失行驅十乘。豈能臥護六軍。輒貢表章。懇辭爵位。伏惟軍容察以有犯無隱之義。難進易退之規。仰贊帝兪。俯從愚願。敢有脅肩諂笑。固無沒齒怨言。幸逢四海之昇平。願指一丘而養老。干黷淸德。兢惕實深。伏惟云云。
I am ashamed to have no art or strategy, and yet I have long stolen glory and favor. I have held the heavy power of the Han laws and climbed to the highest grade of the Qin offices, and I have shown no results. With what shall I redeem my greed and my presumption? Still more, since the bandits came rushing in and the capital fell, I have long held the charge of a place like the throat, and have not made merit the width of a hair. Though the military power in my hand is great, it is truly hard to set a hand to anything, and the lord's kindness is unrepaid, so my face burns with shame. Still more, anger within the house has risen in secret and enemies among the neighbors rise in rivalry. Lu Xun was called only a good official, and Cui Xian bore a grudge in the end against a foolish man. They report openly and slander each other, and many words are a thing to fear. By good fortune the Commissioner has given his heart to shelter me and has held me up with all his strength. Though I met with words like the shell-patterned brocade, I escaped falling into a woven and netted charge. I should only long for his carriage and think of his tent, whip my lame horse and grind my lead knife, set my whole life as the term, and never weary in public duty. But my care of life has seldom been skillful and my service has been long and hard. Teeth and hair have declined, and spirit too is spent. Few private aims and few desires — dare I call myself a gentleman? Much sickness and a love of leisure — here I may say the ancients were right. Wit and strength cannot be pushed forward by force, and marks of favor cannot be used without measure. I truly feel that I stand in a worthy man's way, and it is right only to seek retirement. Now the phoenix gates are swept clean and the owl's nest is stamped out. Bows and arrows go into the case and the soldiers are dismissed, and the war readiness is put away for good. The robes hang down and good rule is reached, and worthy talent is widely employed. As for me, I am cold ash that has stopped burning. Who looks at a dried-up well? The campaigns south and north in years past were mine, unworthy as I was, by the duty that does not yield. But the corpse's salary and the idle meal of this present time shame me the more, for the seat is not mine. Having lost the driving of ten chariots, how can I guard the six armies lying down? So I have offered a memorial and earnestly declined the rank and title. I humbly ask that the Commissioner look at this by the rule that a man may offend but must not conceal, and by the measure that makes advance hard and retreat easy. Help the emperor's assent from below, and look down and follow this foolish wish. Would I hunch my shoulders and smile in flattery? Truly there will be no word of resentment from me to the end of my days. By good fortune I meet the peace of the four seas, and I wish to point to a single hill and nurse my old age. I trouble and defile his pure virtue, and my fear is truly deep. I humbly consider, and so on.