Impeaching Myself after Receiving the Royal Directive有。旨祗受後自劾狀

On the twenty-eighth of last month your servant, being at Dongpa (東坡), received the royal directive, stamped with the seal and sent down by the Right Deputy Royal Secretary, which began 「A great minister has received a charge beyond the gate (閫外)…」

Your servant is by nature utterly foolish and of no account, yet at a time when the state's affairs are shaken he has presumed to take up a heavy charge, and the truth of how he has spoiled the business and brought disgrace upon the country is truly beyond all counting. Still more, he lives on together with the enemy, sits and lets the months and days flow by, has not recovered the capital, and looks only to the Ming troops: your servant's guilt would be light though he died ten thousand deaths. Yet his own poor foolish mind cannot be left unreported before the sovereign.

On the twenty-eighth of the first month, when Commander-in-Chief Li (李提督) was for withdrawing from Paju to Dongpa, your servant, together with the Field Marshal Kim Myeongwon (金命元), the Minister of Taxation Yi Seongjung (李誠中), the Branch Minister of Taxation Bak Chunggan (朴忠侃), the Commissioner for Entertainment Yi Deokhyeong (李德馨), the Commissioner for Grain Transport Gwon Jing (權徵), and the Governor of Gyeonggi Yi Jeonghyeong (李廷馨) and the rest, went forward to the great general's tent and demanded the reason for withdrawing the troops. At first the Commander-in-Chief begged off and would not see us, and said only: 「This place is inconvenient for halting troops; I shall withdraw for the present to Dongpa and stay a day or two to rest the troops, and then advance again.」

Your servants, holding that if the great army once withdrew the moment of the business would be most grave and that men hearing of it would be startled and bewildered, raised countless particulars and argued and pressed him as the hours passed. At the last the Commander-in-Chief came out and stood before his tent with the several generals standing round in attendance, and your servants went forward before him, some standing and arguing, some knocking their heads on the ground and weeping as they begged. The Commander-in-Chief did not cease to explain again and again that he meant to withdraw a little and then advance once more, and even brought out and showed us his memorial to the throne (奏本). When your servant pointed with his hand to some words in the memorial and would not cease to argue and dispute, the great general Zhang Shijue (張世爵) grew angry and kicked the interpreter with his foot and drove us to withdraw quickly. Your servants had no choice but all to cover their faces and withdraw weeping; and the Right State Councillor Yu Hong (俞泓) came after us and begged too, but did not obtain it.

Afterwards, when he was for withdrawing from Dongpa to Gaeseong, your servants beat and struck their breasts and went forward and back begging earnestly, so many times that the number is not remembered. The Commander-in-Chief, having no choice, deceived your servants, saying: 「The horses and men cannot be left in the open; let them withdraw for the present to Gaeseong, and I shall stay here myself.」 No sooner had your servants come outside the wall than the Commander-in-Chief mounted and rode away. Your servants stood by the roadside and looked at one another in startled lamentation, but nothing could be done.

During the long halt after returning to Gaeseong, the talk of making peace had not yet shown its first thread, and so your servant begged earnestly, as each matter arose, only with the purport that the troops should advance at once. At that time the great army had already withdrawn and the hearts of men at Paju, Dongpa and such places were shaken, and so your servant came and stayed at Dongpa. When the Commander-in-Chief was for moving the troops of Gwon Yul (權慄) and Yi Bin (李薲) and withdrawing them all to Imjin, the Commissioners for Entertainment Yi Deokhyeong and Han Eungin (韓應寅) and the rest reported that this was not right, and the Commander-in-Chief had them tell your servant. Your servant at once sent the aide Sin Gyeongjin (辛慶晉) with a letter, reporting strongly that Paju could not be left unheld. At that time your servant was at Dongpa and Kim Myeongwon at Paju, and it was urgent to settle the hearts of men; and the Commander-in-Chief's withdrawal of the troops to Pyeongyang was besides a thing unlooked for, so that your servants had no leisure to ride after him and beg him to stop.

After this the Ming troops stayed long away and did not return, and only General Zha (査將) remained alone at Dongpa and would not speak plainly of the circumstances, but sent Kim Jigwi (金志貴) day by day to go to and fro about Yongsan and such places, so as to obtain and see the princes' letters and the letters of the captive ministers and pass word of them to the Commander-in-Chief. Your servant, fearing that there might again be something like the peace-making at Pyeongyang, went several times with Kim Myeongwon to see General Zha and ask the reason of it. General Zha did not tell the truth of it, but answered with comforting words only, that the great army would go forward and would surely make it its term to destroy them utterly; yet marking his words and his countenance and weighing what he was doing, there was much to be suspected.

One day your servant asked outright what the Commander-in-Chief's mind was, and General Zha then first said that after they had contrived to get the princes out they would advance the troops. Your servant put forth all his strength and said very much to set him right and argue the matter, but General Zha still made the princes his excuse. Your servant, having no choice, broke his argument down according to the great duty, saying: 「Our country has against the Japanese the enmity of its ancestral shrine and its altars of state, and cannot live with them under one heaven. Though contriving to get the princes out be most pressing, it is yet a second matter.」

Presently your servant heard that Brigade Commander Shen (沈遊擊) was coming; and that day he was out at Deokjindan (德津壇) checking the provisions and fodder. He at once sent the aide Sin Gyeongjin to write a small note and present it on the road, urging that the troops be advanced. Your servant followed after, wishing to see his face and argue with him, but the Brigade Commander, being already on the road, raised his hand from the saddle and warded him off from afar and would not meet him. He only said to the interpreter 「I already know what he wishes to see me about」, and rode straight on. On his return too he did not pass Dongpa but went away by water straight from Yongsan. Though your servant be dull and base and of no account, he too has a human heart; how should there be any reason for him to hear only talk of peace and find it sweet to his mind and bow his head and say not one word?

After this, hearing further that among the several generals halted at Gaeseong only the southern general Wang Bidi (王必迪) was fairly for using troops, your servant wrote to him again and again, reporting his plan and begging that choice troops be sent round by the southern road to strike first the enemy south of the Han River and so cut the enemy's road. Wang Bidi too held the plan right and sent out thirty gunners together with Yi Sangyeom (李山謙), commander of righteous troops, to go and look at the roads; and those troops are still at Jinwi (振威). Your servant also drew up a formal statement (呈文) and sent it riding to Pyeongyang, that Yi Deokhyeong and the rest might present it earnestly to the Commander-in-Chief.

Your servant's poor strength and small sincerity are truly already spent with nothing left over, yet there is no gain to the business; your servant's guilt is such that he ought to die, and what more is there to say? Only, the Ming troops' advancing and withdrawing, their making peace or fighting, hang upon the Military Commissioner and the Commander-in-Chief; and while the Commander-in-Chief was in this place he had already not spoken of peace, and since he withdrew the troops he is besides several hundred li away. Those who are here, Regional Commander Zha and those below him, are besides not generals who take resolution upon themselves, and to this day they hide the truth of it and always speak only of carrying out plans and using troops. Though your servant would dash his head in arguing and pressing, he has no way to it; and so he can do nothing but set out in full detail the truth of what he has heard and seen in the meantime, report it all to the court, and beg that it be dealt with in haste and in good time. What he poorly and presumptuously reckons is only this: that the court should early take up the particulars and press the matter where the great general and the Military Commissioner are, so that the great plan may be accomplished.

As for the princes' letter that came out of the enemy camp, and the letters of the captive ministers and of the enemy's head man, your servant saw them too, and there was truly much in them to startle and to pain and to pierce to the bone. From ancient times it has very often happened that, between contending camps, the court did not hear and know the circumstances of the other side and of its own as they touched upon the moment of the business, and so answered wrongly and spoiled it. Therefore your servant could not but consult closely again with Kim Myeongwon and report; yet it was besides hard to report the thing directly, and so some of it was copied and sent up and some sent to the Border Defense Council, to be put in order for reference and handling. He did not know that this was to fall into the guilt of making light of the court and dealing loosely with the state; and this is because your servant in his confusion is dull and wrong-headed and rash and was not careful in weighing the matter. Whither shall he flee from the guilt?

Indeed, the state's affairs being such as this, your servant's dying is already late. To whip his worn and dull body and die between spear and shield is your servant's glory. Of late the soldiers and people of the several places too have a mind to die and no spirit for living, and your servant has never failed to settle terms with the several commanders and make it their term to fight to the death. East and west of the capital they fight and shed blood day by day, and have not been shaken and bewildered by talk of the Ming troops making peace or fighting. Only, the food being spent and the troops worn, we could not bring it to one resolve within a few days and have made heavy the sovereign's cares; your servant's guilt would be light though he died ten thousand deaths.

The state's affairs are of the utmost urgency, and the heavy charge beyond the gate cannot be left presumptuously in the hands of so worthless a servant, laden with guilt as he is, to make the spirit of the three armies desolate and leave the several commanders with no posture of asking and of awe. Let it be given in haste to the officers concerned, that the law of punishment be set right, and let one who is equal to it be chosen and charged with it, so that even a ten-thousandth part may be retrieved and this hard time be saved; then your servant, even on the day of his death, will be as though in a year of life. Your servant cannot master his fear and awe and his tears.